Category Archives: Relationship

Ways to Get a Girl to Like You

download-5There are guys who are naturally suave and can get any girl they wish to fall for them. And then there are guys who have no clue about what to do when the object of their affection is in front of them. Assuming you’re from the latter lot, here’s a piece of advice for you. Don’t panic! First, you’re not the only guy out there who gets tongue-tied when he likes a girl. Second, it’s a perfectly natural reaction to get nervous when she’s around, especially if she has no clue about your feelings.

Make Sure She Knows You Exist

A girl will not give you a second glance if she can’t…well…see you. So, make yourself visible to her. We don’t mean wear neon, we mean do simple things to get her attention. Things like smiling, saying a polite hello, holding the door open for her may seem inconsequential, but these are the things that girls do notice. Find excuses to be around her (not in a stalkerish way though). If you happen to have common friends, get them to introduce the two of you and take it from there.

Look Presentable, Always

OK. So she knows who you are. You guys hang out with a bunch of friends now and then. How can you make her pay attention to you? For starters, dress well. Boys, we know dressing up isn’t on your priority list always, but if you want to make a good impression on this girl you’re sweet on, kindly take the effort to make yourself worth looking at. Take the time to pick out good clothes. They don’t have to be over-the-top expensive designer wear, they just have to fit right and make you look decent.
Pay attention to your hair. Whatever look you’re going for, please complete it. Don’t wear the best clothes and then not wear socks with your sneakers! Yes, girls do notice such things and the tiniest faux pas can alter her perception about you. Always smell good. Girls love guys who smell good. It’s the first thing that attracts them towards you, physically at least. That being said, don’t douse yourself in perfume or cologne. Know when to stop spraying, you don’t want to give her a headache.

Be Well-mannered and Confident

The world says girls like only bad boys. We say girls like guys who treat them nice. Girls like guys who walk on the traffic side of the road, who play with their pets, who respect elders. Girls like guys who will keep the swearing for when they’re with the other guys. Most of all, girls like guys who are confident. So, no matter how nervous you get when she’s around, muster up the courage to at least appear confident in front of her. When you’re confident, it reflects in your disposition.
You must have heard people telling you to be yourself time and again. Here’s the deal: it works. When you’re being yourself, you don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not. There’s no one who can be a better YOU than YOU. So, use yourself to your advantage and see how confident you can be.

Don’t Just Listen, Talk

True: Girls (almost) always have something to talk about.
Also True: Girls like guys who are good listeners.

False: Girls like guys who are only good listeners.

It may be indisputable that girls can go on and on about the tiniest or the biggest of things. But then that’s true even about guys. The misconception is that girls want guys to only listen. The fact of the matter is that, a girl wants to talk to someone who can give the appropriate responses and ensure that the conversation keeps going.
So the next time she talks, listen. Get to know things about her. What she likes and dislikes. What her hobbies and interests are. This way, when she talks about something she’s passionate about, you know what it’s about and can continue talking. You can contribute to a conversation that she’ll definitely not forget, rather than just smiling and nodding intermittently as half the world expects you to.

Give Her a Daily Odd Compliment

Girls love compliments, that’s not news to anyone. What guys sometimes misconstrue this as is that girls love compliments about the way they look. Think about it. She’s pretty: you know it, she knows it. She’s probably heard it from ten other people already. So what can you do? Go beyond her physical being. Compliment her about her creativity.
Admire her patience as she explains a math problem to someone. Tell her how nice it is of her to confirm that all her friends reached home safe after a late night together. Tell her how well she plays the guitar. These are the things girls want appreciated. When you’re complimenting her, be careful not to extol her like she’s a goddess of sorts. She’ll probably just get creeped out and not talk to you again.

Observe the Niceties

When trying to get a girl to like you, this is one thing you just can’t escape. No matter how cliché being nice is, you’ve still got to do it. We’re not talking expensive gifts and promises of the moon. We’re talking simple, yet meaningful gestures that will touch her heart. Remember her birthday. Go one step ahead, remember her family’s birthdays. It will only help your case to get to know her as well as you can, and surprise her with these observations now and then.
Help her whenever she asks for it, and sometimes even when she doesn’t. Remember what her favorite flavor of ice-cream is. Find out what’s her pet peeve. You’re looking at this girl as your prospective girlfriend, as a person you want to have a relationship with.

Be the ‘Friend’ Her Friends Love

There’s an unwritten rule among girls: if I don’t like the guy you’re considering dating, don’t date him. And while there may be exceptions to this rule (just like any other), the importance of a BFF’s approval of a boy in a girl’s love life cannot be ignored. So, here’s the trick: get the friends on your side first. Be extremely nice to them. Help them whenever they need something. Be friendly and fun around them. Be the guy they’ll WANT their friend to be with.
When the girl in question sees what a great and fun person you are to be around, she’ll want a piece of the cake too. And you’ll have a special piece for her, won’t you? *wink wink* Be nice to her friends and they’re likely to put in a good word for you, knowingly or unknowingly. This way, even if it doesn’t work out with her, you can’t have too many friends, can you?

Make Her Laugh

Guys constantly underestimate the importance girls attach to a good sense of humor. A good sense of humor is interpreted as intelligence by most girls. So, make her laugh, make her laugh hard. Smart, witty, dry, sarcastic, goofy: employ any kind of funny you can to impress her. We know it’s not possible for everyone to have the flair of a stand-up comedian and be spontaneous, so it is important to be prepared.
Avoid being sexist. She’ll laugh off a couple jokes, but you must know when to stop. Else you’ll be a labeled ‘that sexist jerk’, a tag that is not very easy to get rid of. Body parts are not to meant to be joked about. Period. Girls generally do not appreciate jokes made about anyone’s body or appearance. Ridiculing other people to make her laugh is not the right way to go about it. If being mean to someone else is the only way you can be funny, please find another way to make Her laugh. Unless insensitive-jerk-who-needs-to-demean-others-to-get-a-laugh is what you’re aiming for.

Flirt with Class

You’ve got to bring in that extra zing to let her know that you have more than friendship on your mind. Flirt: it’s the only way to avoid being stuck in the dreaded ‘friend zone’. But be classy and subtle about it. Tease her with hints here and there so that she knows that you have a romantic interest in her. For instance, if she thanks you for something that you did for her, say something like, “Anything for you sweetheart.” It’s cheesy but it gets the job done.
Physical contact is another important tool to make her aware that you’re attracted to her. But be very very subtle about this. A girl will judge in an instant whether she’s OK with you touching her or not. So you’ve got to be really cautious. Touching her elbow while crossing the street, helping her put on her coat, putting your arm around her shoulders when she’s upset; these are all safe. Maintain a proper distance, give her hints, and let her take it from there. If she likes you back, she will.
You may read page after page about getting a girl to like you, but you’ve got to be prepared for heartbreak as well. The tips given here are just generic ones on what girls generally tend to like. Every girl is different. What may make one’s heart melt may make another’s skin crawl. At the end of the day, all you can do is be true to yourself and to her. The rest will fall into place, if it has to.

How to Say Sorry for Your Boyfriend

images-5Erich Segal, in his book Love Story quoted, “Love means never having to say you are sorry.” However, there are times when things go wrong, when you screw up, and you must say sorry to your beloved. Along with what you say, what also makes a huge difference is how you say it.
Every relationship has its phases of highs and lows. So, did you have your first big fight and come storming back home with tears in your eyes? Do you feel like it is the end of everything and your boyfriend is at fault…or maybe not entirely? Are you regretting to have created a scene and of blaming your boyfriend for unnecessary things?Patching up and having to say you’re sorry is not really as difficult as it seems.

If you are truly in love and regret your act, there are many ways to say sorry to your boyfriend. An apology is an indication that you are embarrassed about the way you acted, and if he truly loves you, he is bound to let go of all the issues and embrace you with immense happiness.

Different Ways to Apologize

Hug

A bear hug should be the first thing on your agenda. A hug goes to show you care, and offers warmth and comfort in any relationship. A warm and tight hug would only help to melt away any feelings of anger towards you.

Gift

It will also go to show you really care and that you do not just say things without meaning them. Romantic gifts, or even better, personalized gifts will definitely help to ease the tense situation between the two of you. Put on your thinking cap to come up with some cool gift ideas that you know he will appreciate.

Scrapbook

Make a cute book which is a compilation of all your fond memories together. You could stick pictures of the two of you and describe the events of each particular picture, telling him how much all those days spent together mean to you. To make the book more interesting, you can also draw or stick pictures of some of his favorite things.

Poster

When asked why do you love your guy, I’m sure you have a long list of answers. It’s time to put those answers down on paper. You can make a poster, with say 50 reasons describing why you love him. Even if your guy is not mushy, this one is bound to melt his heart immediately.

Dinner

What is so special about a dinner you may ask! Well, I’m not talking about those usual dinners, instead something with a twist. If you are a good cook, you can invite him over and prepare his favorite dishes. Take this one step ahead on the romantic meter and light some candles and play his favorite songs. If cooking is not one of your strongest points, you can also take him out. This could be a place that holds a special meaning for you two.

Song

This one is bound to be an absolute hit with any guy. You can look up the lyrics of your favorite song as a couple or a romantic song like Please forgive me, I Can’t Stop Loving You by Bryan Adams, and then sing this song for your beloved. Whether you think you can sing well or no, he will really appreciate your courage for trying. If singing is just not your thing, you can also write a poem or a love letter to him.

Card

Look for a beautiful card or make one yourself with meaningful words, and give it to him personally. If you have a creative streak, you could also write the words yourself to say sorry. You can also look online for meaningful and sweet words to say sorry. Making a card will show that you have really made efforts and want to win back his love.
Tips to Remember While Saying Sorry
If even after trying these ideas, he still shows signs of aggression, you have to be patient and loving. Once he knows how you genuinely feel, he will forgive you for sure. Select a good time to apologize. Do not pick a time when he is busy with work or is loaded with personal problems. Make sure you select a time when he is alone and can listen to what you have to say or to go along with your plans.
Give him ample space. Let him express his anger, but avoid getting defensive. Any kind of argument would only worsen the situation. Try to understand what he is saying and his point of view. It is important that you hear him out first, and then genuinely apologize to him and say you are sorry. The moment he realizes you really mean it, his anger will surely reduce. Besides, you might even get a surprise when he apologizes to you for certain things he may have said!
Time is the best factor, and you only need to keep conveying the message that you care. With time, he will surely come back to you as he realizes how genuinely you feel about the same issue. With love and respect from your side, you are bound to make him realize the importance of the wonderful relationship you both share.

Break Up Tips for Girls

images-4Breaking up with someone you love is hard, especially when you have to question so many aspects of the relationship that need evaluating. There are some tough questions you’ll be faced with, when you’re up against the wall with relationship issues that have been brewing for a long time. You need to clear your mind, and gain some perspective, and ask yourself some pretty nail-hitting questions. How can you be so sure if this is the guy/man for you?

Is he the guy/man you thought you always knew? People change, and one’s true colors come forth once that fake facade is striped away slowly, over time. You’ll come across here on some breakup words of wisdom for girls and women too. After all, guys are very much like men, and they’re not very hard to understand if you know exactly what to look for. It’s all in the way they talk, behave, and interact with others, that will have you answering some of relationships’ toughest queries in the following breakup advice for girls.

Breakup Questions for Girls/Women

If a girl/woman is smart enough to ponder about the flaws that her relationship has, or really look at how chipped it is from certain angles, she really knows what she wants. To really come to a conclusion that you don’t regret, and are happy about, you have to answer some direct, and obvious question, about your relationship.

  • Does he give me the respect I know I deserve?
  • Do my family and friends see something off about him, that I don’t?
  • Do I find myself sticking up for immoral behavior on his part?
  • Is it fair that he misses out on important things that happen in my life?
  • Is he financially stable to support me and possible children in the future?
  • Is he a good influence on people?
  • Are his friends, people I dislike for morality issues?
  • How do I know that he’s not meeting other women on his frequent business trips?
  • How do I know if he wants a future and isn’t here for the moment?
  • Am I okay with him being involved in illegal acts?
  • Am I okay with him meeting his ex-girlfriends too often?
  • If he’s been divorced in the past, how do I know if things will work out for us?
  • Can I handle being with a single father?
  • Am I ready to commit to someone I barely know?

Is it weird that he hasn’t introduced me to his parents yet? (ideal time is within the first 6 months)
Can I handle his over possessive nature?
Is his obsessive nature swerving out of control?
Is it right to feel fear every time he comes around? (abusive in nature)
Am I taking advice from family/friends for granted, about something I choose not to believe in about him?
Is cheating forgivable after the first or second time?
How I do know he won’t repeat his acts of infidelity by covering his tracks better the next time?
Am I ready to gamble away my life if I’m not really sure about this guy/man?
Break up Advice

There are so many areas of a relationship that need to be extracted and analyzed, since no one really knows whom they’re with, even after being with them for years. They say it takes a day to know someone, but that’s just pure crap. Dating a stranger is a little tricky, since you don’t know anyone to ask about this guy/man, and he’s new to everyone you introduce him to. Whereas if you met him through a mutual friend or two, then you know that they have solid background information to know exactly who he is. So here I’m going to take you along the most obvious of problems that most women and girls face. Identifying where you fall, and how you can change your life for the better, is your call.

Long Distance Relationships
When dealing with a long distance relationship, trust me, it is not easy. There are so many things that you have to confront. He could be cheating on you with another woman/girl where he is, he could be using you as someone to have when he’s in town, he could be a totally different person all together, he can disappear on you and never get in touch again, and so on. So ask yourself now how it will come down to compromise as well. Are you willing to leave your place and settle where he’s at? Are you wiling to put your career on hold for him? Can you handle the pressure of a long distance relationship, and manage your studies as well? Are you willing to leave a familiar place to one that you have no clue about? Are expenses a non issue when keeping in touch with him? Is it worth all this trouble? There’s a lot that comes with a relationship that’s miles away. Are you willing to do all that you can to make it work, with no assurance whatsoever, is something you’ll have to answer to yourself.

Extramarital Affairs
You could be dating a married man, and expecting him to leave his wife, and kids if he has any, for you. How can you guarantee that this won’t come back to haunt you someday? He could do the same thing to you, and have you hanging with a pair of kids in tow. Ask yourself if a married man, whose wife has no inkling whatsoever of what he’s doing behind her back, is the right guy/man for you. There are many married guys/men who promise women (and girls) that they want to run away with them and start a whole new life – not really caring about their wives or children. Is this what you want? You want to carry that burden of guilt forever, knowing that what you did hurt someone? Ask yourself if this is how you see yourself years from now – with married men who can change their minds and chicken out on their promises to women/girls they’re with. So think hard about what you’re doing, and honestly the best thing to do, is find someone who has no baggage.

Rebound Relationships
The worst thing a girl/woman can do, is find a great guy/man to be with, who sadly is her rebound guy/man. I totally get why you would want someone else to fill in the space, and be the cause for a distraction. The problem is, you’re in a relationship with this guy/man, and not in a one night stand or casual fling. This is a full-fledged dating scenario, where the guy/man thinks you’re genuinely in it, for the commitment. Ask yourself if what you’re doing is right, and work out your messy past with him, and tell him you’re ready to move on, and make things better with him. If this person is someone you want to just pass the time with, and not really get involved with for the long haul, then the right thing to do, would be to end it well, and then afterward look for something more solid and worthwhile when you’re ready.

You can see why women/girls are caught in a whirlwind of doubts about where things are going, and what they should do about it in a relationship. No one can really help you, except yourself. What people offer in terms of help, are words of advice. It is, at the end of the day, up to you, how you use the above relationship breakup advice to decide what’s next.

Ways to Know If a Girl Likes You Over Text

That’s right! If she laughs at your silly jokes, playfully tells you, “You’re funny!”, thinks your silly anecdotes are hilarious, you’ve won half the battle my friend. Rest assured that she is into you and thinks you are cute.

So, you can tell that she enjoys your company if you ‘see’ her laughing at your jokes. But what happens when you fail to make out what her reaction is? Does her face light up when you text her? And, in turn, does your phone light up with an immediate reply from her? Yes? Oh boy, she does like you!

For the boys, an extra ‘y’ in heyy will go completely unnoticed, or will be shrugged off as a typo, but when a girl does that, she means more than just to say hey. I know, it is a task to discover the hidden meaning behind every emoticon she sends, or the ellipsis at the end of a sentence. But if she lights up your world and makes you want to sing louder than thunder, she is worth all the trouble, right? And after all, Oscar Wilde, who said, “Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood”, was the only person who really ever ‘understood’ women. Yes, you are no Oscar Wilde, and no, we do not have Mr. Wilde to help you out here. What we do have for you is a list of signs that will analyze her texting style and tell you if she likes you.

She teases you…

A girl would only mock or playfully tease someone whom she is extremely fond of and comfortable with. If she teases you about the spelling mistakes you accidentally make while texting, or your funny nickname that your friends gave you, or how you overslept and had to take it from your mom, it shows that she hangs on to every little detail about you.

She asks a lot of questions …

You texted her saying that you have football practice the next morning. ‘How do you feel about football? How many goals are you going to shoot? How did you develop interest in football? Who is your favorite football player?’ Do these questions and more follow? If yes, she is trying to share your interests and create common ground for conversation. She definitely wants to get to know you better.

She initiates conversations …

If she is the one who strikes up a chat more than often, think no more. If a girl likes you, she will send you texts that are sure to start a conversation between you two. Girls do very less of initiation, for fear of coming across as needy or too obvious. If she does it with you, and does it quite often, she sure likes you a lot.

She uses a lot of smileys/emoticons …

Bland text messages, with one word responses are a warning sign, and you should get out of her way ASAP. On the other hand, when she uses emoticons, she wants to make sure you know how she actually reacts. This shows that she has taken the extra effort of telling you that she is excited, or angry, or happy, or sad. An animated conversation dotted with emoticons is a definite pass. She is totally smitten by you!

She responds immediately …

How long do you need to wait after you text her? A few seconds? A few split seconds? You don’t need to wait at all? Rejoice with happiness! An immediate response or a quick reply is a sign that means you are important to her, and that she wouldn’t dream of keeping you waiting. If she is caught up in something, and does not have the time to continue texting, she will let you know that she is busy, and that she will revert as soon as possible.

The content in her messages is personal …

Where did she shop from? What was the flavor of the ice cream she had this afternoon? Why is she upset? Who made her laugh today? -Do her texts tell you about all this and more? She not only likes you, she trusts you. Girls are big on trust and are very protective of their secrets and whom they share it with. If she is comfortable discussing a family problem with you, or a tattoo she is contemplating about, it is possible that she more than just likes you.

When and how she says goodbye …

A girl doesn’t like to come across as very obvious with her interest in you by texting for long periods. Though she wants to, she will fight the urge to continue talking to you, just to make it look like there’s more to her life than you. Pay attention to her goodbyes. If they are cheerful, like ‘Bye, I’ll see you soon’ or ‘Gotta go, but I’ll talk to you later’, it subtly hints that she is sorry to end the conversation now, but will pick it up with you later. She likes talking to you!

She uses your name a lot …

“Hey!” and “Hey, Liam!”, the difference is evident, right? Greeting someone by their name instead of just a plain greeting makes it more personal. The vibe of the conversation changes. It shows how excited and genuinely happy she is while talking to you.
She laughs a lot …

If her texts have a lot of emoticons that depict smiles, laughter, and laughing out loud, she definitely likes you. If you find her laughing at the worst jokes you have ever cracked, take a hint: she likes you. So, she blushes when you compliment her beautiful tresses, and smiles when you tell her how great a dancing pair you two would make. These are not even hints, these are sure-shot signs that she is awestruck by you, and is probably waiting for you to make the next move!

It takes skill to be a girl. Your girl is complicated, hard to understand, mysterious, laughs about stupid things, and cries about stupid things. But it is this girl who is the best part of your day. It is she who makes you go crazy with those cute smileys, innocent messages, and sweet replies. Now that you know what that ‘wink’ really means, stop looking for hints, man up, and go make the next move!

Tips on Understanding Women in Relationships

Why is it that some men have more success with women than others? Is it because they understand the psychology of women? Maybe, maybe not. It is imperative to realize, that women think differently than men when it comes to relationships. They are much more intuitive compared to men. They have a broad perspective on issues, which make them prone to becoming overwhelmed on occasions.
Men generally focus on one problem at a time or a limited number of problems. They are also able to separate themselves from problems and look at it from an external perspective. Let’s go through some focal points to consider, when in a relationship.

What Women Want

Attention Please!

A woman’s biological makeup to settle down. Even if a woman doesn’t say so, she is aware that her biological clock is always ticking. Women need to be treated in a way that make them feel special and important. You need to show her that she is the most important person in your world. Pay attention to little details. Express yourself by letting her know you are thinking about her, especially when you are apart, otherwise she will be emotionally distraught.

Are You Listening?

When she exclaims this, she instinctively knows you’re not. All women want is someone to hear them out, share their troubles, and empathize with them. If she does not get this, she will stop opening up to you altogether. You may notice her saying something at one time, and then find her doing the total opposite on some other occasion. You should understand why all this is happening and be supportive, or you will often pay for it in ways you may not even realize.

Surprise! Surprise!

Women love to be surprised occasionally. You need not buy expensive gifts; what matters is the sentiment behind the gift, not its cost. You can buy flowers or present her with a personalized greeting card. Be open to trying new things. All that matters to a woman is how you do it, and without her knowing about your surprise plans.

You’re Special

“Yeah yeah, you look fine” is not a compliment. Women like to be flattered about their beauty or the dress they are adorning. This makes them feel desirable and attractive. Women want to know if they are your first priority or not, they need reassurance from time to time. So text her randomly and remind her about a romantic dinner or a getaway you both shared.

The worst thing you can do is ogle at another woman when she is around. Never say the other woman is more beautiful, even if it is a fact. Try telling your woman how special she is; you don’t need to overdo it, but just remind her every once in a while about it.

Watch Your Ways

Women are more sensitive than their male counterparts. They never forget an incident related to infidelity. If you have hurt your woman in a similar way, and if she constantly uses a past scenario during arguments, clearly she hasn’t forgiven you. Women forgive but don’t forget and have a hard time handling such dishonest conduct – it makes them feel exploited by their selfish partner. Work it out and try to come to an agreement to never talk about it.

Men tend to forget fights, but women remember them for a long time. That’s why you can say something to your girlfriend, and a few days later she may ask you, “What did you actually mean when you said … This is because women are hypersensitive to your actions and words. Whenever you are wrong, admit it. And when you are right, keep mum. She will eventually notice her mistake.

What Day Is It?

How is it that men sharply remember dates such as mortgage payments and insurance renewals, but accidentally forget an anniversary or a birthday? I know you were not being rude or deliberately hurtful, but not remembering certain dates that laid the groundwork of your relationship, makes your partner feel disconnected or less important. These little things that you do, go a long way in showing your partner that you really care.

Chivalry Counts

All of us like to secure our spaces, and love to be treated with respect. In the same way, women dislike narcissists who misuse or ill-treat them. Women are always attracted to a man of refinement, someone who is kind, polite, and formal. Things like opening the door for her and offering her your seat still matter in modern times. Women always prefer well-groomed and mannered men. Women dislike men who brag and lie. They judge men by how they treat the women in their own family.

What Else Matters

Constant Praise and Gratitude

Like men, women too love to be showered with praises. This act will not only give her hope, but would also boost her self-esteem. It also conveys a feeling of being appreciated and loved. She does not expect you to read her mind to show her you care, but she does expect you to compliment her, sincerely and genuinely.

Making Time

Spending quality time is an important factor in a relationship, given one’s busy life. Ask what your woman would like to do, take a vacation together or try something new. Set aside a day to celebrate and rekindle your love, with just the two of you hanging around. If the woman you are dating, rightly fits the soulmate or future wife quotient, acknowledge your commitment to her. Let her know your future goals and plans that surround her.

Keeping Promises

Women don’t like to be promised something that is then broken repeatedly or not lived up to (due to forgetfulness, which is a very poor excuse). What men could do in this case is, diligently make note of the promises made and plan it accordingly, just as they plan things for the future of the family, since it of course matters a lot to his partner.

Acknowledging Commitment

If a man can foresee a future with a woman, he should make it known to his family/friends. He should also emphasize her importance in public and not treat her like a nobody, or disregard her obvious presence.
So avoid building walls around your emotions, instead talk it out. Open the doors of communication and express your feelings or thoughts, which will help you in avoiding conflicts. Be kind, considerate and loving, spend time with her and start thinking of ways to bond with her emotionally.

Amazing Things to Say to Your Girlfriend

It’s easy to say what’s in your heart or on your mind if you are honest and open about your feelings, which isn’t easy for many guys. Relationships rely on not only trust and loyalty, but a balance where both partners can be themselves, without forcing make-believe emotions into the equation. It is important to work on one’s feelings by tapping into emotional pockets like gratitude, appreciation, love, understanding, compromise, and forgiveness.
No one expects either partner to go on an emotional overload everyday, but as often as one can, to keep things alive and young. For guys who find it hard to communicate with their girlfriends, it is a commendable quality to seek help from other sources, on how to do this. You’ll find that the suggestions on sweet things to say to your girlfriend, will propel you to come up with your own lines, in no time.

Sweet Things to Tell a Girlfriend
The key to making these lines sound genuine, is to mean them. Don’t use these lines to fulfill some kind of sneaky need or get away with something, because eventually she’ll catch on. If you really love her, you’ll use these lines to make her feel better and reassured; by default you’ll feel good too.

– Of course I love you. Don’t you ever doubt that.
– If I didn’t love you, I wouldn’t be so incredibly hopeless when you’re not around.

– Remember that trip we took last spring? The one where you put together that amazing itinerary? We should do it again soon.
– I drew a bath for you. Let me give you a foot massage while you soak in the tub.

– I made reservations at this incredible bed and breakfast. Happy anniversary!
– I’m sorry you lost your job. Look at the bright side – you still have me.

– Good morning beautiful! I woke up a little early to make breakfast for you. Meet me downstairs, pronto!
– I think it’s my turn to prepare dinner for you tonight. I rented a new DVD. You’ll love it.

– If a hot woman walked up to me, I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t feel great. But that doesn’t mean I’ll act on it. You make me want to be better, and to stay that way.

– You need to be with someone who lives to make you happy. I could be that someone.

– Most men aren’t emotionally strung, they’re built from steel. They hide pain effortlessly. But behind closed doors, we’re weeping for the women we love.

– How do you manage to take my breath away every single time I see you?

– I’m sorry if my jealousy drives you up the wall. But it’s only because the thought of losing you scares me.

– Shut up and kiss me, I haven’t seen you for an entire day.

Couples who are crazy about each other find it easy to say how they’re feeling, while showing it without restraint. Find it within yourself to say something nice to your girlfriend once in a while, if not all the time. No one expects unrealistic measures, so drop a line now and then to brighten things up for her.

Ways to Make Your First Date Special

Okay, so you have finally managed to get into the good books of that new girl in tight jeans in your college, and gone so far as to get a date with her. However, perhaps you are feeling jittery about it right now. It is normal, though. About 99% of the populations feel shivers running down their spine when the first date comes around. The rest 1% of the population are Don Juans, and I am sure they will not need this article in the first place.

Enough of the small talk now! We need to put your little love-struck heart to rest, and soon. Read on to find some cool ideas for this special occasion. Of course, you must remember to be suave enough to carry them ahead. So, bonne chance, and read on.

Idea # 1 – The Amusement Park
My favorite place to take a girl out on a first date is surely the amusement park. Really, I am not joking! Most girls like that sort of stuff, even the older ones do! And there is so much to do in an amusement park that you will be soon out of time. You can do fun things together like bumping cars, going whacky on the roller-coasters, racking your brains out laughing at yourselves in the funny mirrors, or simply eating candy floss together. And then, you can cozy up in a small café in the park and get to know each other better!
Pros: Amusement parks are meant for fun. Even if your girl has come in a nasty mood, she will lighten up soon and enjoy with you. Also, you will be able to impress her as a fun-loving young man.
Cons: You might not find a comfortable corner for just the two of you. Amusement parks are usually crowded.

Idea # 2 – The Cinema House
The cinema house is always a favorite when guys are planning their dates. Nowhere else can you get to sit so close together (so close that you can actually smell her hair!) for so cheap! You must make sure it’s a movie the girl likes, though. Or she might attach the mediocrity of the movie with you. In a lighter vein, the cinema hall is the perfect place to hold hands if you wish, and even land a tiny little peck on the cheek – an initiation to a good relation. Girls, in their part, do love to weep during melodramas (keep handkerchiefs ready) and scream their lungs out if it’s a horror flick. Speaking of that, it’s really fun to take a girl out for a horror movie. You might have to convince her, though.
Pros: Movie halls are cheap and you can share popcorn and other things together :).
Cons: If she hates the movie, she might hate you! Make the choice wisely.

Idea # 3 – The Beach
When it comes to planning a first date, the beach is always right. It is open and crowded, so girls feel safer on beaches, and beaches are fun. You can sit under a parasol and gossip about things, you can get an ice cream for her, play Frisbees … be a regular Archie and Veronica for a day, if you want! Just make sure your eyes do not stray to the other sights on the beach – that could be a super fiasco!
Pros: Beaches are the cheapest option, and there’s lot of fun to be had. Where else could you have a chance to check out your girl in a bikini on the first date? If things go wrong, you can even admire the other bikinis.
Cons: The beach idea might not work if your girl is the bookish type. You might not know, but there is a species of girls who do not like beaches. If your lass is one of them, check out the next idea.

Idea # 4 – The Bookstore
The bookstore? Come again? Yes, buddy, you heard it right – the bookstore is an excellent idea for many reasons. Firstly, girls love books. Some of them also read them 🙂 Okay, serious now … At the bookstore, you can get to know what the girl’s likes and dislikes are. That comes in handy if you are contemplating a gift for her. You can check out what her tastes in music are. Wise men say people who have similar tastes hit it off better. So, you can actually get a hint of how far this relationship can go. Yes, the bookstore is a good idea for future planning. And whoever said a bookstore is all about books? There are cafés where you can sit together and chat – some of these cafés are really very cozy.
Pros: You get to know more about the person in the bookstore. And you need not buy anything. If you do that, this is the cheapest date idea.
Cons: You might feel a bit bored if you stay too long. Or, worse, your girl might feel bored. However, that really depends on your likes. I know of people who spend hours in bookstores without feeling a tinge of boredom.

Idea # 5 – An Expensive Dinner
Let’s face it – all of us cannot afford an expensive dinner on the first date. But if you really have that kind of money, and if you are something like a celebrity who cannot be seen in cheap public places, then a dinner in a swank restaurant is the best bet. It is very wrong to say that the surest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Wrong, because it applies to women too. And girls go more for visual grandeur. So, if you are able to have an exclusive five-course meal with her and show your gourmet knowledge, there’s no doubt she’ll be impressed. And it will pave the way for a second date. Discreetly, you can decide to do something cheaper the next time. It would work since she already knows your gastronomical etiquette. Make sure to decide the next date before the dessert comes in!
Pros: Makes way for a long-lasting relationship, filled with happy gastronomical delights!
Cons: Money, money, money! Get those American Express cards ready.

Ways to Manage Work and Family Life

There was once a young man who was unable to manage office and home together. He was plagued by deadlines he had to meet at work, and he always saw his children only when they were asleep. He did not know what to do! One day, the young man’s father visited them. The young man told his father about the problem. The father smiled and promised to bring him a solution. The next day the father turned up with a colorful coleus plant. The young man was puzzled. The father said – “Tomorrow when you leave for work, simply touch the youngest of the coleus leaves and say ‘To you I leave my household woes, for now I am a man of the world’; and when you return from work at night, touch the same coleus leaf and say ‘I am returning to my wife and kids – let them both find their husband and father respectively, and not a man troubled by his work life’.” And as sure as the sun rises in the East and sets in the West, the young man regained balance in his life.

If only everyone could find a coleus like that! But the essence of the story is – problems are a problem only till we treat them as problems! Here are some easy-to-follow tips to manage your work and family life.

Don’t Bring Work Home

This is probably the gravest mistake a man / woman can make as a partner, a parent and a family person – bringing work home. It just spoils everything! Your wife is not going to be happy with it, your children are going to miss their Dad, and heck; it is going to kill your sex life too! On the other hand, if you are a woman, you are going to kill yourself by bringing work home! Your children need their mother even if she is the CEO of a really big and important company. It is never a good idea to bring work home. The best thing to do if you have pending work is to reach office a little early and leave a little late, rather than carry work home. That way, you can be completely there for your kids and for your partner once you are home.

Don’t Carry Family Problems to Work

Just the way it is important to not bring work home, it is also important to leave family problems and tensions home, before you step into the office premises. Carrying family problems to work is totally unprofessional and can hamper your performance. If you are going to come to office and still be stuck up on your child’s homework or the bank loan for your house, your boss is not going to like it. Plus, it is not a professional who mixes work and family – nah uh! Agreed, not everybody is affected as much by family problems, and there are people who can segregate the two easily and effectively, but there is still that subconscious load that we always carry. The best way to take care of this is to completely immerse yourself in the task at hand, so that you can block out anything else that may prove as a conspicuous (or even subconscious) distraction.

Two Different Phones

This is probably the best tip I can ever give – use two different phones, one for your professional life and one for your family and friends. Make sure you do not exchange the professional number with any family members or friends, and do not exchange the personal number with any people at work. That way, you can ‘choose’ who you want to be available to at what time in the day and on what days of a week. At the same time, you can inform maybe 2 or 3 of your closest family members and closest colleagues about both the numbers, in case it is absolutely necessary for them to reach you. A mobile phone can be as much of a bane as a boon! It is in our hands to be able to manage the device rather than turning into a slave of technology. Take charge, and turn things around.

Weekend is ‘Me n My Family’

The weekend is the one time in the week when you can totally be a family man / woman. Kick back and relax. Do not attend to any work related calls. The call of duty should not only be professional but should also be personal. If you plan your work well, you will be able to meet all deadlines and still be with your family without feeling guilty of having left work undone. It is all only a question of managing your time. If you are unable to give your family time during the week, then segregate the week into working days and weekends, and do justice to both of them. Be a complete professional during the week, but when it is weekend, forget you are the GM of your firm, and be the father / mother your kids want you to be, show them your love and affection. Be the husband / wife your partner needs you to be, and let her / him know you still haven’t forgotten how she / he likes to be touched!

Talk to Friends

The thing is, we get only one life. So we can never be ‘prepared’ for certain things. We do not have the experience of becoming a parent when we become a parent for the first time. We do not have the experience of being married when we get married for the first time. Sometimes, this is why certain situations in life overwhelm us. But if not your own, you can definitely learn a few things from the experiences of those around you. So do not shy away from talking to your family, friends and relatives. Do not feel like it is a failure on your part that you cannot manage to do something. Many around you also probably couldn’t manage to do it the first time they tried. But if today they have succeeded in doing something, so can you. Take inspiration, and grab the bull by its horns!
The biggest of our follies is that sometimes we fail to realize the fact that we do not always have to choose between two things; sometimes the solution to a problem is to choose both things. There can be a win-win answer to such questions; if only we look for them sincerely, they will enlighten us. Follow these tips as sincerely as you follow the company employees handbook. Just because nobody is going to penalize you for not giving your family time and attention, does not mean it is not going to have any effects. In fact, if you get sacked, you can still get another job; but a broken home is one that is almost impossible to fix. So take the time out for both the things, as they are both important in life. All the best!

Ways to Avoid Falling Into the Dreaded Friend Zone

It most often happens with men, but even women are not immune to the risks of being in a “friend zone”. Popularized by a highly popular US television sitcom Friends, a friend zone implies a virtual zone in a platonic relationship where a person is strictly within the confines of a friendship with no possibility of romance. In fact, a person in the friend zone is, oftentimes, a romantic counselor and finds access to every place in the other individual’s life except between the sheets.

For someone who was hoping to start with a friendship with the sole intention of gaining trust and then taking the relationship to the next level, being trapped in a friend zone can be an extremely frustrating prospect. Adding salt to the wounds is having to watch your dearly beloved winking at you while swaying in the arms of another lover. If you’re the “best friend”, then you’ll need superhuman self-control while having to hear all the steamy details after his/her romantic outing. Ouch! But there are ways out of this conundrum that effectively threatens your friendship and wanes the remotest chance of developing romantic feelings.

Steering Clear of the Friend Zone
If you’ve had past experiences of being stuck in a friend zone and wish to start anew with your latest love interest, here are some strategic tactics that may help you avoid being seen as “just a friend”.

Tips for Guys to Avoid the Friend Zone

Turn On Your Flirt Quotient

This comes easily to most guys but the key is to time your actions perfectly and keep it brief. A friend will hold or hug much longer (and perhaps more sincerely) than a flirt! Remember that your intention is not to be insensitive but bring in that “distance” or “line of control”, so that she gets the hint that you’re not comfortable with all the touchy-feely unless you’re in a relationship that warrants that!
Take advantage of lonely times with her and drop the subtle clues without getting too physical. Try to work up just enough chemistry to leave her thinking about what just happened.

Ensure you Have a Chance
If the woman is already attracted to another guy and heading towards a serious relationship with him, don’t slide yourself in between them. If eventually they’re not meant for each other and you’re willing to wait, you may be blowing your own chances by being a jerk.

Don’t be a Doormat

This is true for any relationship, but more relevant if you’re looking for a romantic future with a person. Don’t be too available for running errands, helping out or as a shoulder to cry on. Use your discretion because this is different for every relationship. You don’t want to come across as a callous dork but you also have “other engagements” that you cannot just drop and rush to be with her at all times. Be there for her at times and at other times, not so much.

Don’t be an Agony Aunt
Is she sharing her every emotional struggle with you, especially concerning guys? Don’t counsel her to the point that she sees you as her father figure to turn to in case of failed love affairs or guys being mean to her. Be supportive and protective, but don’t offer too much advice, and state your views in a matter-of-fact manner. You may use this opportunity to convey subtly that you’re not all that comfortable discussing her other love liaisons.

Man Up a Bit
Don’t switch off your chivalrous instincts, instead grow one if you don’t already have it. Even in this day and age of active feminism and gender equality, women are invariably turned on by reasonable acts of chivalry that are not over the top.

So don’t give a lot of thought and be self-judgmental about say, giving her a ride to the airport or being present in a time of severe personal loss. However, be careful not to become her regular “on-call” chauffeur or a regular babysitter to her sister’s kids. Quit walking her dog every evening.

Date Other Women

Unless you’re almost sure she’s attracted to you and you’re close to making her your girlfriend soon, be normal around other women. Look around, date other women like you would do normally. Not to sound like scorning your lady love, but you can watch her reactions and look for that streak of jealousy just to reassure yourself that she is at least a slight bit interested. Everything is fair in love including using her jealousy to your advantage.
Again, don’t overdo this or you’ll scare her away for good.

Pop the Question
The above techniques are for consciously avoiding the friend zone. But sooner or later you have to quit trying and face up to the results of your strategic tactics. Yes, find the right moment and let her know your true feelings. Do this as soon as you know she also may have the same feelings. If you’re not sure after all that while, well, there’s only one way to find out. You may be potentially throwing away a friendship, but then that’s not what you were looking for anyway, right?

Tips for Girls to Avoid the Friend Zone
Well, most of the above tips with the exception of being chivalrous and manning up would work for girls as well. In addition, here are some more tips for the women who want to avoid the friend zone.

Dress Up

If you’re hanging around the guy (with secret desires in your heart) in your gym clothes or night clothes just because you think it’s alright, think again. Not to undermine your need to feel comfortable, but if you want him to take notice of your feminine charm, dress up like a girl at least around him, at least most of the time! If he has never thought of you “in that way”, surprise him and make him aware of the very desirable woman standing before him that he already knows.

Stop Whining
If you don’t want to be stuck in the friend zone, keep your sob stories for your girlfriends, unless you can really pull off a damsel-in-distress episode without making a fool out of yourself.

Acknowledge His Presence

If you want him to be more than just your friend, indicate your intention in a subtle fashion. While
dating other men and showing outwardly that he is just another guy is alright for starters, once you have his attention, let him know that you are aware of his presence, make an impression, flirt your way to physical intimacy, work your body language and there, you have him and not as a friend!
Women have a way of overdoing sentiments, emotions and indulging in dramatic histrionics. Exercise some restraint or you will find him gone as soon as he arrives!
There are several instances where people graduate from pure platonic friendship to lifelong marital relationships. There’s no rule that you can’t be romantically involved with your best friend. But if you find yourself in relationships where you’re constantly being sidelined to witness intimate relationships between your love interest and other people, then you have to tweak your attitude just a bit and follow the recommendations given in this article.

Ways to Set Healthy Boundaries in Relationships

The dictionary meaning of the term ‘boundary’ is something that indicates bounds or limits. In other words, boundary is a territory or a line that should not be crossed. Therefore, it is very important to know your personal boundaries in any given relationship to make sure that you are treated with respect and your identity is safeguarded. First, determine your territory, secure your space and then be willing to take the risk. Apparently, some may not like it and they may even leave you, but you should be confident and believe in yourself. If the person in front understands, he/she will start treating you with more care and respect.

Knowing What You Want

It is necessary that you learn to treat yourself decently first, be confident, understand your true worth or else you will end up attracting narcissists who will misuse you, ill-treat you or trick you. Creating boundaries in relationships means being very clear about your likes and dislikes. You have to make others aware that you are an independent person and would not tolerate any excessive interference in your life. If you do not set proper limits, the other person might feel that you don’t have any opinion of your own and can be ‘easily handled’.

Nobody wishes to be treated abusively, be misled or deceived. We all want to be handled with care, respect and love. Therefore, it is fundamental to interact, communicate and share your thoughts with the other person. These boundaries will indirectly tell others who you are and what you need. It’s your right and obligation to be accountable for how you let others treat you. Establishing boundaries will not only ensure we learn about self-control and respect, but also help us produce mature relationships on the basis of trust with our family, friends and neighbors.

Be Reflective

Always remember that a relationship can work only if both parties respect the boundaries set by them. Domestic abuse – whether physical or mental – is a result of the lack of boundaries not being set in a relationship. The oppressor takes it for granted that his/her partner should follow the instructions and stop his/her individual thinking process. The mistake that the victim commits here is ‘staying quiet’ and letting the oppressor cross the line. Most of the time, the victim keeps quiet because of the intense fear and worries of what would happen if they react. How can you build a healthy relationship if you keep mum? Victims who do not talk or express their feelings always end up ruining their relationship. What they should do is learn to say ‘NO’ when their partner’s actions are irrelevant.

Setting Healthy Boundaries

While establishing boundaries, one ought to communicate with their partner in a very straightforward way. Lay down a pact, be firm when placing your demands, give reasons and justify how you feel before you set a boundary. Do not go ahead with the relationship until you get an affirmative answer from your partner. Make sure that this person will honor and consider the agreed-upon boundaries.

The main goal in any relationship is for both parties to feel calm, loved, cared, appreciated, respected, centered and focused. To balance and survive, we set healthy boundaries for us to feel comfortable and safe in each other’s company. In any case, these boundaries are applicable for both you and your partner and so you should also patiently listen to what your partner wants from you. See whether you agree to the terms put forth by them and then take a decision.

What You Should Abide By

Do you sometimes add unrealistic boundaries and end up putting too much pressure on the other party? Do you have trouble setting a boundary? Never start too fast or too slow for that matter; there’s a time to confront and act.
Boundaries should be set in such a manner that they enrich your lives and not take away your life. A one-sided relationship never works, where one partner is the rescuer and the other is a victim. Relations that start with a clear, stable boundary are always the most successful ones. Below is a checklist to consider in a relationship.

☑ Always communicate and express your feelings. There are plenty of people out there who love to take advantage of you, if you are unable to express what you want.
☑ Guard yourself while rescuing people. Don’t go overboard trying to help someone, you will end up making them feel needy and helpless all the time. This is actually depriving someone or crippling someone from living an independent, healthy and mature life.
☑ Let’s suppose you are at a stage of life where you are mature enough and are really enjoying yourself, then be cautious not to let anyone enter your life and steal the happiness from you; for love is not letting people use you and take away your life or happiness from you.
☑ Similarly, you need to be careful of whom you let inside your life. You should be clear about this person’s motive, is he/she coming in to add value to your life or to increase trouble in your life.
☑ You can choose to build a healthy and realistic boundary that leads to abundant life or prefer to be silent and be victimized by others. The choice is yours and you are responsible for your life.

Setting these boundaries is necessary in many cases due to the dominating and aggressive behavior of the partner. Sometimes, one partner starts calling all the shots in a relationship and leaves the other as a mere spectator. He or she starts taking all the decisions without considering the opinion of the other. This can be very frustrating as one loses personal freedom and the right to voice their opinion. If you do not want to hurt your self-respect, you would have naturally set a boundary and taught others how you prefer to be treated.

What You Should Not Accept
Given below are some of the practical or sensible boundaries to set in a relationship.
☒ You will not bear physical or emotional abuse under any circumstances.
☒ You will not tolerate deceiving or infidelity in the relationship.

☒ You should be given equal importance in financial matters.
☒ You should not be forced to do the things which you do not like to do.

☒ You should have full freedom to meet people whom you like.

☒ You should be given full freedom to take all your career decisions on your own.
☒ It is Not Okay to hit you or call you names.
☒ It is not tolerable to cheat on you.

When you are open-minded and confront these things, you end up setting an expectation that improves your relationship and you start becoming more confident about yourself.

Mosaic Law

Do you recollect the cardinal rule that God set through, “The Ten Commandments”? They were nothing but boundaries that God set for us to follow. It includes the laws that God gave to the Israelites through Prophet Moses. In the same way, we must also establish boundaries in our intimate relationships. In particular, let’s go through the 6th-10th Commandments. It teaches us or disciplines us as to, how we should set a relationship base or foundation with trust and loyalty. The scripture says:

»The 6th Commandment: “You shall not commit adultery.”

»The 7th Commandment: “You shall not steal.”

»The 8th Commandment: “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.”

»The 9th Commandment: “You shall not covet (crave for) your neighbor’s wife/husband.”

»The 10th Commandment: “You shall not covet (crave for) your neighbor’s goods.”

These are some of the boundaries set by God for us to live an abundant and fruitful life.

Love, freedom, friendship, responsibility, respect, trust, faith and protection are all the key elements required for a steady and balanced relationship between a man and a woman. It’s high time you took ownership of your own life first, before you start taking responsibilities of others’ lives. So don’t be shy, ashamed or threatened to voice your opinion; feel free to set a boundary and stick to it!